Jesus' Lesson Plan

This was given to me by a substitute teacher way back when I was student teaching. I found it again the other day and laughed and laughed. (I'll have to print it off and share it with the staff at the one school I work for where regular teachers don't treat substitutes like the insignificant hairs that grow on the legs of gnats.) Wish I knew who wrote it, so I could give the author credit....

Jesus Teaches a Lesson

Then Jesus took his disciples up the mountain and gathering them together, he taught them saying:

Blessed are the poor in spirit...

Blessed are they that mourn...

Blessed are the merciful...

Blessed are they who thirst for justice...

Blessed are you when persecuted for righteousness sake...

Blessed are you when you suffer...

Be glad and rejoice for great is your reward in heaven...

Then Simon Peter said ``Do we have to write this down?''

And Andrew said ``Are we supposed to know this ?''

And James said ``Will we have a test on it?''

And Phillip said `` What if we don't know it?''

And Bartholomew said ``Do we have to turn this in?''

And Matthew said ``When do we get out of here?''

And Judas said ``What does this have to do with real life?''

Then one of the Pharisees asked to see Jesus' lesson plan and inquired of his terminal objectives in the cognitive domain.

And Jesus wept.